10 Reasons Why Norway is the Happiest Country on Earth

Last time, I wrote about the major inconvenience of Norwegian living. Today, I wanted to tell you about some of the delightful everyday conveniences that make Norway the happiest country on Earth.

The bread slicer

Have you ever wanted to buy really nice bread for sandwiches, but were discouraged because it wasn’t sliced? Or, did you buy the bread but end up with really thick (or really thin) slices? This is not a concern in Norway. As far as I can tell, every grocery store has a bread slicing machine like the one below. We are eating way better bread than the bread we eat at home. Please enjoy my demonstration for Andrew.

[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o7XHZq33P5Y&w=560&h=315]

The cheese slicer

Gavin prefers a wire cheese slicer because it cuts a really thick slice of cheese. I think that’s garbage, because 1) it doesn’t cut well (exhibit A at 0:27), and 2) you don’t always want a 1/3-inch-thick slab of Food Lion-brand cheddar.

I prefer the Ostehøvel cheese slicer invented by Norwegian businessman Thor Bjørklund. See how much easier it slices cheese?

The Ostehøvel cheese slicer.

Heated bathroom floors

Most bathrooms in Norway have heated floors. The obvious advantages are that it keeps the floor warm without taking up space, it heats the whole bathroom, and it doesn’t use much power. Apparently this comes in very handy in the winter, especially for bathrooms on the ground floor.

I have an alternative theory, however. Your bathroom floor is wet 90% of the time, because you probably don’t have an enclosed shower. So, the heated floor helps the bathroom dry ever so slightly faster, and it makes the floor palatable to touch with bare feet, since your socks would just get wet.

Euro-bathroom.

The robot lawnmower

I have spent a fair amount of time with roboticists.

Roboticists.

So, the fact that I had never heard of a robot lawnmower before moving to Norway means they must really not be popular in the US. It doesn’t cut the grass well, but it does mean that you don’t have to cut the grass.

[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ULg0aia4k1s]

Our favorite disgusting foods

Gavin loves pickled fish, and I love salty licorice. Both are in abundance here.

Pickled fish.

Trampolines

My grandpa Whiteman would have loved Norway. When he was in his mid-fifties, he built a house that only had one bedroom, but had a two-story, indoor, in-ground trampoline. I have never quite figured out why this happened (or how the house was ever sold), but it made for some pretty awesome trips to Cincinnati. The Norwegians share Gramps’ love of trampolining so much that it has become a public health problem. The map below shows all the trampolines in our immediate vicinity.

Trampolines.

Healthcare

Norway provides universal health care. America doesn’t.

Winter sports

Trondheim seems to prioritize fitness. There are gyms on pretty much every corner and several major hiking and skiing areas nearby. In the time we’re here I hope to try cross-country skiing, biathlon, ski jumping, ski kiteing, roller skiing, and fjord swimming. At least.

They support my favorite athletes

I have been an avid cyclist/triathlete ever since college, especially since it’s something I can do with my dad. My favorite sporting event is the Tour de France.

Maybe one day I can be as fast as him.

Trondheim seems to have a collective enthusiasm for cycling. In order to encourage cycling in a city built on a mountainside, Trondheim has a bikeshare program and the world’s only bicycle lift. Apparently people ride their bikes year round here (although I’m not sure if I’m that tough). Needless to say I can cheer for Edvald Boassen Hagen, Alexander Kristoff, and my other Norwegian faves in good company.

Edvald Boassen Hagen is thrilled to be in the candle aisle.

Not working

I thought I was going to have a hard time with this. So far, not a problem.

1pm on Tuesday.